It's been a terribly precious time for me. Over the last couple of months, I decided to become homeless and support and help hikers finish the Appalachian Trail. There were plenty of times when I struggled but they were more than outnumbered by the times that I would never trade-in. Lately, I have been gathering the sad times. As many of my friends climbed to the climax of the several-month struggle they endured; I had to watch them soar from the ground. I celebrated with who I now call my family knowing that our time was ending. With more heart-felt goodbyes than I could handle, I am now left alone. Everyone planned on going back to the life they knew. Many to come back one day but I stand still now that it's all gone. The adventure of a lifetime lived its short days in the sun. I don't want to leave but that sun is setting on me. I can't stay here, I know that. But I didn't plan on going anywhere else. Winter is setting in and I have to stay warm. It's not that I'm not welcome here. It's just that there isn't a "here" anymore. This place was so alive and vibrant. It lured me in much like many others. The difference for me was that I decided to build a permanent residence here. I dug my foundation into the sand and looked out into the coming tide. It was sweet though. As I watched my kingdom retreat off the shore and into the distance abys. I walk the beach as it too begins to sink into the depths of the closing season. I ponder my options wondering if I can handle another end to something so beautiful. I look into my decisions and realize this is the life I chose. Not that I willingly decided to be sad. It is just the trade-off for being so happy. The price of the morning sunrise is that you have to sit in the dark for a while. And now that the sun is setting on me, I must accept that it is only the darkness that will greet me. But that's the beauty of the dark. It is always there and much like the good and bad of our lives it too will always leave you. I can't help but wonder how long until I get to smile at the growing daylight. To once again feel the warmth pass through my outer shell and into my soul. For now, I wait, I bundle up, and I sleep to prepare for more excitement. For those of you that I have had the wonderful privilege of meeting over the past seven months, I thank you. With tears in my eyes, I feel so grateful to have been a part of your journey.
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